So, things are going OK. Friendship with Elsie is going well - Very *nearly* got her to go out with me last night, but she had to drop out at the last moment. In my old age and paranoia, I did momentarily fleet with the idea that she made an excuse not to go, but if I think sensibly about it, you would see that she didn't and I'm just being silly.
Social calendar is beginning to revive itself again slightly. I've discovered that there's a pub in the City Centre where they have an upstairs Gin Parlour. Being a gin lover that I am, I was naturally keen to check it out. It's actually a room upstairs in the bar which has been done up to look like an old Victorian drinking parlour with a small bar in the corner and oak panelled walls, it also has (reputedley) the largest and most comprehensive collection of gins in the West Midlands. It's only open to the public on Friday nights from 5pm - with a selection of gin-based cocktails on offer 5-8pm. LH, RH and myself first went last week as I (obviously) wanted to try it and we could have some drinks before dinner at Syriana later. It was intially going to be only 1 or 2 drinks as both LH and RH were saying that they don't like gin. We got there and it was fairly empty - Only 1 other bloke in there. We all choose a cocktail and they get brought over to us. I went for a bramble and even though he substituted one of the ingredients, upon hearing how I like sour tastes, the bartender adjusted it slightly so that it was more sour than usual and it was DELICIOUS, the revelation however, wasn't with my drink - It was the fact that both LH AND RH tasted their drinks - And liked them. Nobody was more surprised than they were - They actually like gin! As the drinks kept coming in and we all got more and more drunk, Leah started to name the bartender as the Gin Master, it took us a few more drinks before we found out his name is Steve. He is now known as Steve, the Gin Master to us. There is also the fact that we were only going for 1 or 2 drinks - And ended up spending the best part of 4 hours in there..
It was so good that we all decided to go to the gin parlour every friday night - Last night is another blog waiting to happen..
Saturday, August 15, 2009
Monday, July 20, 2009
Feeling a bit lost
OK, the past couple of weeks have been a bit hectic - Firstly, I was diagnosed with a mild Swine Flu a few days before Hannah was due back in the UK. Fearing the worst and to give me an extra few days to recover fully, it meant that she couldn't stay in Birmingham over the weekend. Thus, we hastily arranged for her to go to Sandie's for the weekend, returning on the Sunday so I would get an extra couple of days to be better. It wasn't just incase I infected her - It was just as much she didn't bring anything with her after being on a plane from a foreign country for so long and infected me with my lower immune system levels. Obviously, it meant I was off work but I was only supposed to be working until the Thursday anyway (for Hannah's arrival on the Friday), so if anything, the illness ate into my holiday.
So for the past week, I've been able to spend time with Hannah again and it's reminded me of how much I miss her. I'll go into more detail about stuff in another blog post, but we had arranged for everyone to gather at Wendy's on Friday night as it would be the last night Hannah was in the UK. Everyone except Mandy and YML (who is still in the US) turned up so it was good for 6 daughters to be together with Mum. Of course, it also meant that when it came to saying goodbyes on Sat morning, it was that more poignant. YKL and I were both acutely aware of how emotional it was going to be and were both determined not to cry. However, I was teetering on the edge all morning and when it came to loading her suitcase into the car, Hannah could see that my lip was quivvering and just said "don't cry!" which only made me cry more. She gave everyone a hug goodbye but she and I had a longer hug as we both were in tears and well, because we are pretty close. I know that Wendy saw the expression on my face when I hugged Han and even now, as I type this over 24 hrs later, I am crying.
Years ago, Han once asked me if I would cry if she left and I can remember thinking "Why? are you going to leave?", I guess she found out the answer yesterday!
So anyway, I've been feeling a bit lost today because for the first time in a week, she's not been here when I've woken up, or I've not had something to do with her. I seem to have lost my baking and cooking mojo and I haven't known what to do with myself today. Fortunately, I don't go back to work until Tuesday, so it gives me an extra day to gather myself. Here's hoping that I can get back into work mode sooner rather than later..
So for the past week, I've been able to spend time with Hannah again and it's reminded me of how much I miss her. I'll go into more detail about stuff in another blog post, but we had arranged for everyone to gather at Wendy's on Friday night as it would be the last night Hannah was in the UK. Everyone except Mandy and YML (who is still in the US) turned up so it was good for 6 daughters to be together with Mum. Of course, it also meant that when it came to saying goodbyes on Sat morning, it was that more poignant. YKL and I were both acutely aware of how emotional it was going to be and were both determined not to cry. However, I was teetering on the edge all morning and when it came to loading her suitcase into the car, Hannah could see that my lip was quivvering and just said "don't cry!" which only made me cry more. She gave everyone a hug goodbye but she and I had a longer hug as we both were in tears and well, because we are pretty close. I know that Wendy saw the expression on my face when I hugged Han and even now, as I type this over 24 hrs later, I am crying.
Years ago, Han once asked me if I would cry if she left and I can remember thinking "Why? are you going to leave?", I guess she found out the answer yesterday!
So anyway, I've been feeling a bit lost today because for the first time in a week, she's not been here when I've woken up, or I've not had something to do with her. I seem to have lost my baking and cooking mojo and I haven't known what to do with myself today. Fortunately, I don't go back to work until Tuesday, so it gives me an extra day to gather myself. Here's hoping that I can get back into work mode sooner rather than later..
Wednesday, May 27, 2009
In Memoriam
It's coming up to Dad's Deathday (May 31st), so naturally, I've been thinking about him a bit more in recent days. It's been 7 years and whilst the pain and emotions are not so raw anymore - The feelings you experience with such a loss are still there.
The first step was to actually be able to call it a Deathday - You have a day of birth, so why not a day of death? You wouldn't use the word "anniversary" to describe the day as I often associate it with happy occasions and whilst we try to celebrate his life - We are overwhelmed by the feeling of sorrow and loss. Besides, everyone knows what I mean when I say a Deathday.
I've also begun to talk about him a bit more. I was chatting to Elsie about food (naturally) and she mentioned how she doesn't really go for food that has been ground - Like patés and sausagemeat around Scotch Eggs (it's a textural thing). I mentioned how we don't really grind and pound food in Chinese cookery, but I then thought of how I used to love it when Dad would be chopping up some meat finely on the board with 2 meat cleavers. I used to love the sound it made and would giggle at how he would have some strange head/body movement that accompanied it, or how a movement that was very much like a drummer would produce such a thing. Of course, the meat didn't really matter after that - I loved the process of it all. I remember fondly the first time I tried to do it myself - Only to realise that I was hopeless at it! I could get the sound I liked, but not chop the meat up at all!
I got a bit teary this morning though - I was looking at my shelves and saw a Chinese jewellery bag and I had no idea what it was. I opened it up and found Mum's watch - to go with Dad's watch I kept after he died. The two of them bought matching his and hers watches years and years ago and when we were in Hong Kong in 2006, Mum was going to sell it until I asked her to keep it as I wanted to keep the pair given I had Dad's watch. Mum gave me her watch last year but I had completely forgotten about it until this morning. I opened up the case to Dad's watch too and saw that there were 2 tie-pins in there. One of the things about Dad is that he liked to wear a tie all the time - Even if he was wearing a polo shirt! But generally, he wore a shirt and tie - And always with a tie pin/clip. I remember Hannah saying just after he died how she would like one of these pins/clips and given how she's coming over in July, I think it would be the perfect time to hand one over to her.
I have no point to this post.. Just wanted to get it off my chest, I suppose..
The first step was to actually be able to call it a Deathday - You have a day of birth, so why not a day of death? You wouldn't use the word "anniversary" to describe the day as I often associate it with happy occasions and whilst we try to celebrate his life - We are overwhelmed by the feeling of sorrow and loss. Besides, everyone knows what I mean when I say a Deathday.
I've also begun to talk about him a bit more. I was chatting to Elsie about food (naturally) and she mentioned how she doesn't really go for food that has been ground - Like patés and sausagemeat around Scotch Eggs (it's a textural thing). I mentioned how we don't really grind and pound food in Chinese cookery, but I then thought of how I used to love it when Dad would be chopping up some meat finely on the board with 2 meat cleavers. I used to love the sound it made and would giggle at how he would have some strange head/body movement that accompanied it, or how a movement that was very much like a drummer would produce such a thing. Of course, the meat didn't really matter after that - I loved the process of it all. I remember fondly the first time I tried to do it myself - Only to realise that I was hopeless at it! I could get the sound I liked, but not chop the meat up at all!
I got a bit teary this morning though - I was looking at my shelves and saw a Chinese jewellery bag and I had no idea what it was. I opened it up and found Mum's watch - to go with Dad's watch I kept after he died. The two of them bought matching his and hers watches years and years ago and when we were in Hong Kong in 2006, Mum was going to sell it until I asked her to keep it as I wanted to keep the pair given I had Dad's watch. Mum gave me her watch last year but I had completely forgotten about it until this morning. I opened up the case to Dad's watch too and saw that there were 2 tie-pins in there. One of the things about Dad is that he liked to wear a tie all the time - Even if he was wearing a polo shirt! But generally, he wore a shirt and tie - And always with a tie pin/clip. I remember Hannah saying just after he died how she would like one of these pins/clips and given how she's coming over in July, I think it would be the perfect time to hand one over to her.
I have no point to this post.. Just wanted to get it off my chest, I suppose..
Tuesday, February 17, 2009
Waste not, want not
I stopped by my local Tescos after work tonight. I had my dinner sorted (thanks to Mum bringing home a doggy bag last night) so I knew I had some plain chow mein and some dim sum I could reheat. For that reason, I didn't really want to go because a) I'm being extra thrifty with my money as I fly out to Miami next week and b) I know what I'm like and I would end up picking up stuff I didn't really need, but I needed to pick up some oranges and pads for Mum so it meant having to go to Tescos on the way home. I planned to just pick up oranges, pads, some more carrots for lunch (week 2 of crudités and houmous for lunch and Becky has noticed that I've lost weight too). But, in true form - I noticed that the reduced veg rack was REALLY full, so I headed over to it. I picked up some large bags of coriander (thought I could add it to the chow mein to liven it up a bit and could also add it to a curry I could defrost for dinner tomorrow). Then I noticed there was a whole CRATE of loose, yellow bananas. Sure, most of them were bruised and some had split - But the majority of them were fine - Just a darker yellow instead of pale yellow like on the shelves. I immediately thought they would be perfect for banana bread given how I've been trying to age some bananas in my house for the past 2 weeks but they always end up being eaten first! So, I start sifting through them and after a while (about a minute?) I feel someone tap my arm, I look up (I've got my ipod on so can't hear a thing) and a guy with a bemused expression on his face is pointing at the Tesco employee. I remove my headphones and he's there shouting - SHOUTING - at me saying "YOU CAN'T BUY THOSE, THEY'RE NOT FOR SALE. IF YOU BUY THEM, THEY WON'T BE REDUCED. THEY'RE ALL SPLIT AND ARE GONNA BE THROWN AWAY" I look at the guy and tell him its for banana bread and he's like "well, they're not reduced", I pointed out that he said they were gonna be thrown away and he retorts that whilst that was true, they're still not reduced or for sale. I couldn't believe what he was saying - I wasn't thinking they were reduced anyway, I honestly thought of nothing but really ripe bananas for Banana Bread, but to throw away perfectly edible bananas.. Now I see why there's such problem with food wastage. Mind you, to say they're gonna be thrown away and then charge me full price is pretty shitty too. Dammit, this better be the best banana bread ever!
Sunday, February 01, 2009
Has it been a year already?
I noticed that the Superbowl is tonight and it's reminded me how a year ago, I was at the Marriott Biscayne Bay at the Cayamo pre-party. I'd already been in Miami a few days and had spent the previous day driving from Miami to Key West to see the sunset and then back to Miami. I was already having a brilliant time being in Miami and seeing J again, and I was full of suspense in anticipation of what the next week would bring. Little did I know that the 7 days that folllowed would be amongst the best I've ever had and the most amazing experience on every sensory level.
I had shyed away from introducing myself to people at the party because well, I'm quite a shy person when you first meet me - I only open up to people after a while. J, on the other hand, makes friends left right and centre - in complete contrast to me, so she was busy chatting to anyone and everyone at the party.
I've already mentioned how those 7 days on the boat were some of the best I've ever had - I had such a good time that there we no question about going again next year. Well, I'm all booked and ready to go, we set sail on February 28th from Miami. I'm counting down the days..
I had shyed away from introducing myself to people at the party because well, I'm quite a shy person when you first meet me - I only open up to people after a while. J, on the other hand, makes friends left right and centre - in complete contrast to me, so she was busy chatting to anyone and everyone at the party.
I've already mentioned how those 7 days on the boat were some of the best I've ever had - I had such a good time that there we no question about going again next year. Well, I'm all booked and ready to go, we set sail on February 28th from Miami. I'm counting down the days..
Monday, January 05, 2009
Decisions, decisions...
OK, so I'm in a bit of a quandry here.. I have to make some (tough) decisions and whatever choice I make, it's going to result in the other party being let down/upset.
*sigh*
Fortunately, I'm lucky enough that it's not anything life-threatening and I'm just whingeing a bit here, so forgive me.
OK, so I want to see the solar eclipse. Q would also *really* like to see the eclipse. However, it's in July and realistically, it means I only have 4 months to save up. I can't afford to pay for anything right now because I've got a holiday in 7 weeks time so any money I'm saving now is for that. If I try to leave it until after my cruise (or at least nearer to the date of departure), I run the risk of it being sold out. To counter that, I heard back from the tour operator who has offered to provisionally reserve some tour places for us - just need to give him numbers. So it's down to the flight from HK to Shanghai. I've found a flight for £350 which is the cheapest out there, so everything should be all good right? Well, not exactly. The eclipse is during the rainy season and I would be really pissed off if I've paid all that money and find that it's cloudy and raining on the day of the eclipse.
If I discount the whole eclipse thing, it would mean that I don't have any time constraints so I could go back with Mum in the Autumn which could be good on several fronts:
I need to stop being so excited and think about this properly and clearly.. I can't think properly at the moment because I'm just so excited about going back to HK. I guess that deep down in my heart of hearts, I know that much as I would *love*to go for the eclipse - it's just a trip too far for me. I need to sit down and thinking everything through clearly.
Still, I bought some more lucky dips on the lottery today with the winnings from a previous lucky dip Ibought in July (and only just about managed to claim!).
Sorry, I'll stop whingeing now
*sigh*
Fortunately, I'm lucky enough that it's not anything life-threatening and I'm just whingeing a bit here, so forgive me.
OK, so I want to see the solar eclipse. Q would also *really* like to see the eclipse. However, it's in July and realistically, it means I only have 4 months to save up. I can't afford to pay for anything right now because I've got a holiday in 7 weeks time so any money I'm saving now is for that. If I try to leave it until after my cruise (or at least nearer to the date of departure), I run the risk of it being sold out. To counter that, I heard back from the tour operator who has offered to provisionally reserve some tour places for us - just need to give him numbers. So it's down to the flight from HK to Shanghai. I've found a flight for £350 which is the cheapest out there, so everything should be all good right? Well, not exactly. The eclipse is during the rainy season and I would be really pissed off if I've paid all that money and find that it's cloudy and raining on the day of the eclipse.
If I discount the whole eclipse thing, it would mean that I don't have any time constraints so I could go back with Mum in the Autumn which could be good on several fronts:
- More time to save up for the trip
- Weather will be cooler
- YKL would be more inclined to join us
- I suppose I wouldn't feel so bad asking for the time off work in Sept/Oct as it's longer after my cruise
I need to stop being so excited and think about this properly and clearly.. I can't think properly at the moment because I'm just so excited about going back to HK. I guess that deep down in my heart of hearts, I know that much as I would *love*to go for the eclipse - it's just a trip too far for me. I need to sit down and thinking everything through clearly.
Still, I bought some more lucky dips on the lottery today with the winnings from a previous lucky dip Ibought in July (and only just about managed to claim!).
Sorry, I'll stop whingeing now
Saturday, January 03, 2009
Motherland
OK, so I've made no secret about been wanting to go back to Hong Kong ever since I got back in November 06, the problem would always be Mum and getting someone to look after her (For my cruise in Feb, I've already got Sandie, Q and YKL to look after her). When I read about a solar eclipse just outside Shanghai in July 2009, I knew this could be a good opportunity for me to go back to HK as I can say to Mum that I'll take her back to HK and use that as a base of operations. I've seen a tour where it's a 5 day tour of Shanghai and the eclipse for £379 - Brilliant! Except the price doesn't include airfare and looking at prices from HK to Shanghai, I'm looking at another £500 or so. So I'm looking at £900 and I'm not even in HK! Let's say another £450 (honestly, how can a flight from HK to Shanghai be nearly as much as a flight to HK from the UK?!) and we're talking near £1500 - And I've not even included accomodation in Hong Kong. Also, I've got my cruise in Feb too. If I hadn't already paid for the cruise and could pull out, I would absolutely drop out and focus on saving up for Hong Kong. As it stands, much as it pains me to say it, | may not be able to afford both eclipse and HK and between the 2, I will have to forgo the eclipse trip.
Anyway, I'll worry about that at a later date. For now, let's celebrate and get excited about the fact that it looks like I'll be going to Hong Kong again. I just spoke to YKL and told her the news that Mum is up for going back in July and it surprised her too. She doesn't really have enough leave but I was saying that if I don't do eclipse, then perhaps she would like to come back to HK with Mum and myself? This time we can do all the other things we didn't get a chance to do last time. It may mean she has to swap around with holiday dates with her friends, but I think she's quite up for it too. I had to keep pausing when on the phone to her because I got all emotional and started crying again. It's quite pathetic really, but the thought of going back to Hong Kong really makes me emotional.
Still, I'm now very excited - Just wait until work hear how I want to take 4 weeks off in July!
Anyway, I'll worry about that at a later date. For now, let's celebrate and get excited about the fact that it looks like I'll be going to Hong Kong again. I just spoke to YKL and told her the news that Mum is up for going back in July and it surprised her too. She doesn't really have enough leave but I was saying that if I don't do eclipse, then perhaps she would like to come back to HK with Mum and myself? This time we can do all the other things we didn't get a chance to do last time. It may mean she has to swap around with holiday dates with her friends, but I think she's quite up for it too. I had to keep pausing when on the phone to her because I got all emotional and started crying again. It's quite pathetic really, but the thought of going back to Hong Kong really makes me emotional.
Still, I'm now very excited - Just wait until work hear how I want to take 4 weeks off in July!
Dream a little dream...
I've been having some odd dreams recently - For the past couple of weeks, I'd say. They mostly quite bizarre - Like the one I had on Crimbo Eve I think it was. I actually needed a pee in real life and it got through to my dream, thus I began to dream that I needed a pee. Somehow, I could distinguish that the feelings I was experiencing were for real and not part of the dream, so instead of faffing about in my dream going "I need a wee!" I *actually* said to myself in my dream "Well if you need a pee, just get up and go for one then." To which I duly woke up, and went to the bathroom. It was only when I was on the loo that I realised that I had just woken myself up mid-dream.
A couple of nights ago, I dreamt that I literally found a baby that a mother (I may have known her, can't say for certain that I did) had left (in an old fashioned pram) because she had to go back to get something. I should also point out that this mother was en route to taking the baby to her mother's so that the grandmother would raise the child (because she didn't want it?) Anyway, I found this baby and it needed a wash and a nappy (bizarely, there was no nappy on this baby). Oh, this was at some sort of train station of sorts (though not really one that I could recognise). My dream then consisted of me trying to find a decent "parent and child" facility where I could wash the baby and then put on a nappy. I did that and made sure the baby was tucked in properly in the pram (I was worried how the cold weather now would affect it). Then the Grandmother and mother came back to claim the baby and I remember being quite upset at having to hand the baby over - Even though I knew from the beginning when I found the baby that I would have to hand it back. I was saying things to the mother like "You didn't even want the baby! you were taking it to someone else to look after!." Then I woke up feeling quite bizarre. I don't often get broody, but the fact that I dreamt I got broody and felt a bond with a (phantom) baby makes me feel quite odd.
The other night I dreamt I was running across a road and usually, I can not worry about being run over - Cos it's not real and I'm dreaming. But this time, I actually looked at oncoming traffic and I realised that if I had crossed the road at that point - I was going to be run over. So I physically stopped myself from crossing the road - Could that be a near death experience?
Finally, I just had a really strange one - And I must stress that this was a DREAM. It's not real in any way. I dreamt that I was watching some sort of a film because it didn't feel like a dream. But I dreamt that Obama and his family were shot by a sniper whilst en route to his inauguration. It was completely make-believe because they were walking through some dilapidated building and it was on the staircase that it all happened. First it was the wife and daughters (3 of them?) and they were all screaming for Obama, but like in the movies when you shout at the screen going "Don't go!" As soon as he headed down the stairs, there was an exposed window and with that, he was shot. I also remember some voiceover saying "I SAID that he will never be President". I feel all odd because even now in 2009, I feel a sense of anguish over Obama being President of the USA. For all the heralding of a new change and a new dawn over electing a black man (or at least, non-white), until he's *actually* President, I'm not celebrating just yet.
So then, I'm a broody person who needs a wee in the middle of the night and unduly worries about the President-elect of the USA. Problem?
A couple of nights ago, I dreamt that I literally found a baby that a mother (I may have known her, can't say for certain that I did) had left (in an old fashioned pram) because she had to go back to get something. I should also point out that this mother was en route to taking the baby to her mother's so that the grandmother would raise the child (because she didn't want it?) Anyway, I found this baby and it needed a wash and a nappy (bizarely, there was no nappy on this baby). Oh, this was at some sort of train station of sorts (though not really one that I could recognise). My dream then consisted of me trying to find a decent "parent and child" facility where I could wash the baby and then put on a nappy. I did that and made sure the baby was tucked in properly in the pram (I was worried how the cold weather now would affect it). Then the Grandmother and mother came back to claim the baby and I remember being quite upset at having to hand the baby over - Even though I knew from the beginning when I found the baby that I would have to hand it back. I was saying things to the mother like "You didn't even want the baby! you were taking it to someone else to look after!." Then I woke up feeling quite bizarre. I don't often get broody, but the fact that I dreamt I got broody and felt a bond with a (phantom) baby makes me feel quite odd.
The other night I dreamt I was running across a road and usually, I can not worry about being run over - Cos it's not real and I'm dreaming. But this time, I actually looked at oncoming traffic and I realised that if I had crossed the road at that point - I was going to be run over. So I physically stopped myself from crossing the road - Could that be a near death experience?
Finally, I just had a really strange one - And I must stress that this was a DREAM. It's not real in any way. I dreamt that I was watching some sort of a film because it didn't feel like a dream. But I dreamt that Obama and his family were shot by a sniper whilst en route to his inauguration. It was completely make-believe because they were walking through some dilapidated building and it was on the staircase that it all happened. First it was the wife and daughters (3 of them?) and they were all screaming for Obama, but like in the movies when you shout at the screen going "Don't go!" As soon as he headed down the stairs, there was an exposed window and with that, he was shot. I also remember some voiceover saying "I SAID that he will never be President". I feel all odd because even now in 2009, I feel a sense of anguish over Obama being President of the USA. For all the heralding of a new change and a new dawn over electing a black man (or at least, non-white), until he's *actually* President, I'm not celebrating just yet.
So then, I'm a broody person who needs a wee in the middle of the night and unduly worries about the President-elect of the USA. Problem?
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